Gary and Barbara's Christmas Newsletter 2025

 

Christmas 2025 
Stetson Mansion
Deland, Florida

We hope our newsletter finds you well and able to enjoy this special time of year, however "enjoy" is defined by you.

Our annual Christmas/year-end letter sent to everybody we have ever known and loved is now officially replaced with a blog post. Increased postage rates and arthritic hands have played a big part in this decision. Also, social media enables us to share more pictures. They say a picture is worth a thousand words, so maybe our snapshots will speak more than we write. 

Since our first date was just before Christmas, we can honestly say this is our 5th year to celebrate together. Scratching our heads, we wonder how time has flown by so quickly?!

While during these 5 years there have been some major surgeries and half a dozen ER trips, we have still been blessed with good times, a lot of laughter, and a surprising amount of travel.  Neither of us is getting any younger but we are making the best of every day, grateful to be able to say that.

On the subject of travel, we are never away from home for long, which makes it easier to pack a smaller suitcase, avoiding heavy luggage. 

We continue to ride our bicycles nearly every day, which is a wonderful benefit to living in North Central Florida. We bought a good bike rack so we can load up to explore some paved trails, but most of the time we pedal 4-5 miles through the multi-purpose asphalt paths in our +55 community.

We make trips to Florida National Cemetery in Bushnell to visit the resting places of our dear ones. Christmas is an especially beautiful time to ponder memories and blessings.

In February we drove to the Everglades to ride an airboat through the grassy marshes, spying birds, turtles, and gators along the way. 

We drove down to Key West for a brief overnight visit. The weather in February is good for Key West, which translates to "a lot of people." The line to get our picture taken at the southernmost point in the USA was looong, so a passerby took this picture of us a few feet north of the monument. 

We enjoyed a wonderful lunch at an outdoor seaside cafe. Yes, it's true, Key West has chickens walking all over. They were underfoot as we ate but they were not a bother.

Also in February we took a day trip to the Greek town of Tarpon Springs, sitting on the Gulf Coast at the mouth of the Anclote River. After a wonderful lunch literally on the water at Dimitri's (doesn't that sound Greek?!!), we took a tour on a boat that collects sponges from the river bottom. The diver gave a very informative talk on how that is done and then shared his helmet with any who wanted to try it on.

In April some of Gary's family did the traveling to see us. We had lunch at Crump's Landing in Homosassa, and enjoyed the mermaids at Weeki Wachee.

On another day of their visit we took them to La Chua Trail in Gainesville to see the gators. There were more than we could possibly count, sunning themselves on the beach.

This year we have visited two historical farms within an  hour's drive (or less of our home). We prefer to embrace the history of "old Florida" instead of the theme parks. 

Gary poked around the barn of Marjorie Kinnan Rawlings, author of The Yearling and Cross Creek. The house tour was very interesting .....

The story was told that for her housewarming party, her dear uncle was not able to attend. He sent in his place a large bouquet of flowers, which she placed in the brand new toilet for her guests to see as they toured the home.

We enjoyed lunch at the rustic Yearling Restaurant in nearby Hawthorne where it is (quoting the Internet description) "well-known for serving local exotic carnivore edibles, as well as the usual fare." We opted for entrees that were not "exotic" but enjoyed the themed decor. 

A few weeks later we visited Dudley Farm National Historic Landmark in Newberry, Florida. The plantation was abundant with history as we learned how the family not only met their needs agriculturally but also contributed greatly to the development of their part of Florida.

Gary does his own laundry at home, so he felt very comfortable in this setting. (need I point out who is the comedian in this marriage?)

July took us to Camp Blanding in Starke, Florida to a World War II Museum. Gary explained to me the particulars of a properly made military bed. 

It was during this very interesting tour that we realized we should pursue the idea of visiting the National World War II Museum in New Orleans. 

So this fall we did just that -- took a road trip to New Orleans (NOLA)! The National World War II Museum is top-notch. Made up of some 7 galleries, it's an immersive experience that informs, shocks, and humbles the visitors. I think I've matured some from learning about that time in our nation and our world history. 

On another day we rode on the top level of the hop-on hop-off tour bus -- twice! It's an excellent way to get a birds-eye view of the city while listening to descriptions of everything we passed. 

On another road trip, we headed way up north. While everybody knows New Orleans sits on the Mississippi River, for this trip we were within an hour or so of where the great river actually begins. I thought it would be fun to get a Christmas card picture with the river behind us but later realized my hair was blowing straight up! So instead it's buried in this Christmas letter - ha-ha!

On this trip we visited family members, some of whom we had not yet met. This year Gary was blessed with his 4th Great-grandchild. Until this trip, he had met only one, the red-haired cutie who came to see us earlier in the year. In this visit we met the Minnesota Twins and their new baby brother. While the littles stole the show, we enjoyed visiting with all the adults.

On our way home from the north, we spent a couple of hours at the National Corvette Museum in Bowling Green, Kentucky. It had some mighty pretty cars in there!!! And the history of the Corvette was interesting, too.

Our most recent adventure was only about 60 miles from home. The Stetson Mansion, built by the creator of the famous Stetson hats, is another historical treasure. At this time of year it is absolutely, thoroughly and most abundantly decked out inside with Christmas decor. There are multiple nativity scenes in every room, as well as reminders of Santa Claus, the Grinch, snow scenes, and toys. 

Our home is not as thoroughly decorated as the Stetson Mansion, but it's plenty for us. It's our haven where we can shut the door on drama, stress, and conflict to enjoy peace, good food, coziness, and the blessings of love. 

That is our desire for you this Christmas season and into the New Year. Merry Christmas!

Composed/written by Barbara

Edited/proof read by Gary

Respecting Holy Week

 

source of these flowers
that I bought for myself!

My blogging friend, Jennifer, said in her comments on my last post, 

"I love a 'nice chat with a friend' feel when blog reading." 

I'm so glad she feels that way because that's what I hope to achieve as these words are pecked out on the keyboard. (visit Jennifer's blog at this link: Trading Ashes for Beauty)

All of us need people we can just be ourselves with, those who will listen to (or read) our stuff as we pilot ourselves through the delights and disappointments of life here on earth. And we all have both. 

Contrary to my usual blogging habit, it's not been an entire week since my last post, but I wanted to share some things here before my Easter submission. 

one of many lakes in my
+55 retirement community

The above photo is at one of the two locations where Gary and I always stop our bikes to sip some water before continuing our usual route back home. My friends who know birds can probably make an accurate guess as to what kind of fowl are out there in the water. I know this much, they're not ducks, probably Egrets. So beautiful. Scenes like this are pretty much a constant here, for which I am grateful.

new water softener

Retirement does not guarantee peace. This week there was a disruption to our tranquility (and the checkbook) with the realization that our water softener needed either repair or replacement. Due to its age, we opted for the latter. 

Something I have noticed in recent years, many things in a house tend to need replacement around the 15-year mark. That has proven true here. In the three years that Gary and I have been together, he has replaced the air conditioning system, the floors, painted the exterior, had the roof replaced, had to change out some light fixtures, and updated the landscaping (with more to come in a couple of weeks). That's just a nugget of experience for homeowners among my readers to keep in mind.

flowers from Publix

On Wednesday morning we took flowers to the cemetery to decorate the graves of our late spouses. I know Tom would like this bouquet I carried on my lap as we drove down there, especially the yellow roses that were tucked in there.

markers like this help us find our destinations

With this being a veterans' cemetery, Gary likes to say our dear ones are buried among heroes. I like that.

On an inconvenient note, I shed some tears at the cemetery (not unusual) and had to wipe my glasses dry when I got back into the car. However in doing so, I managed to pull apart the frame and one of the lenses fell out! We were an hour away from home and had plans to enjoy lunch at a nearby Cracker Barrel, so I felt kinda blind for a couple of hours until we could get back to town and make a bee-line for my eye doctor's offices. While my cataract surgery of last summer had improved my distance vision, my reading ability is just about nuthin'!!! without glasses or readers, unless the font is huge. Gary helped me figure out my food choice on the menu and it was all good.

On a more cheery note, I tried a new recipe from Taste of Home. If you subscribe to their website, perhaps you saw it, too. If so, did you think, as I did, that it was a pleasant contribution to the spiritual tenor of this Holy Week?

my version 

Maybe intended to remind us of church stained glass windows, Broken Glass Jello does just that. It is a little labor-intensive and called for using up a lot of pans due to the required number of colors/flavors of jello. But I thought the effort was justifiable for an occasional treat. 

photo from Taste of Home

This picture from Taste of Home looks better than my finished effort, which is still in the 'fridge right now, firming up. I plan to slice into it this evening. In the meantime, you-know-who was given utensils to scrape the bowls before washing up and he gave the impression that the recipe would be a success.

Now to move more fully into Holy Week... Church hosted a Maundy Thursday event with five stations that have been prepared for contemplation, prayer, and communion. Intended as a solemn activity, a printed sheet of instruction is made available at the entrance. People were to progress at their own pace from one area to the next. 

station 1

This first station focused on reflecting on our sins before God, silent confession, and trusting His forgiveness. Then touching a folded towel beside a jar of water, we were urged to remember Jesus' humble service of washing the feet of the disciples, and our need for grace. 

my [plastic, disposable] communion cup,
which I brought home with me

The second station was a remembrance of Christ's atoning sacrifice -- how Jesus paid the price/punishment for our sins. A small plastic chalice was provided that contained the bread and the juice for a very private communion service proclaiming Jesus' death until He comes.

The third station gave the participant scripture to be read either aloud or silently, thanking God for His Word (the Bible). Index cards and pens were provided for writing an especially meaningful verse to take home.

station 4

At station 4, which as you can see, continued with the theme of tasteful decorations illustrating the theme, the focus was praise and worship. We read Psalm 100:4-5,

Enter his gates with thanksgiving

    and his courts with praise;

    give thanks to him and praise his name.

5 

For the Lord is good and his love endures forever;

    his faithfulness continues through all generations.

The last, station 5, had a cross and opportunity to pray submission to God's will, to whatever He revealed during this process. Again pens and index cards were provided for writing a prayer. The participant could take the card home or leave it at the base of the cross. Assurance was given that no one would do anything with the cards. It was simply an opportunity to "seal the deal" (my wording) on commitments made. 

I am glad to have been able to experience this Observance during this Holy Week to think and thank, so to speak. Just as we go to the cemetery to remember and honor our loved ones who have died, this activity on Maundy Thursday was a pondering of what God has done for us through Jesus Christ. 

May we all sing with the Psalmist:

Magnify the Lord with me;

Let us exalt His name together.

Psalm 34:3

Adapting to 2025

Plumbago bush in our yard
January 2, 2024

Please forgive if you get tired of me saying every winter how thrilled I am to have flowers like this in my yard in the dead of winter. 

my deck in April 2017
Castle Rock, Colorado

After many happy years in Colorado, where snow on my property was most definitely an annual event, now the delights of warmer winters in Florida are a welcome change.

The snapshot of snow-covered deck furniture was taken during my last winter SPRING, actually, in Colorado. My Colorado friends know scenes like this are entirely within the realm of normal. But in all fairness, I hasten to add that the elevation of my home then was 6,000 feet higher than the near sea level where I live now.

what a difference a few feet can make! 😏

Time marches on and so many aspects of our lives quickly change. This new year of 2025 has gotten off to a terrible start, as you all know if you keep up with the news. I won't get into that but will share with you Gary's words to me just about any time I leave the house without him: 

Be watchful, be careful

Look around you

... and similar admonitions to be aware of what's going on around me as I drive, exit and enter the car, enter and exit stores, encounter other people, and so forth. Also, if you see something, say something. This is how we have to live now.

Moving on to more pleasant topics...

at-home service call

After we bought our Ford Maverick truck in late 2023, we were introduced to the practice of service calls where the dealer sends the workers to our house instead of us having to drive 20-30 minutes to the service center. The above picture was taken as the serviceman from Ford prepared to change the oil in our truck. He moved the vehicle into the street and did it all right there. We've had them come for other services, too. It's worked out very well. So that's something new to us in our rapidly changing world.

my basement storage in Colorado 2017

Another change that has come back to mind recently is my storage options as we packed away Christmas decorations. The husband-and-son-built shelves in the basement of my last Colorado house held even more banker boxes than illustrated in these pictures, all carefully recorded by number with a computer spread sheet identifying the contents for easy location. It was a thing of beauty! an organizational delight! (This professionally-trained secretary was in her glory!!)

These memories came to mind as I wrapped and tucked away the nativity animals into only one of two banker boxes now designated for Christmas. Retirement and other life alterations define my current home with much less square footage. But it's okay. "In acceptance is peace," as the missionary to India, Amy Carmichael, was quoted as saying.

Christmas trees and boxes

I've said before that a few years ago I was more than happy to unload my 6-7 foot artificial tree onto my daughter's family so I could buy a table-top tree that has much fewer ornaments and gets stored away upright in a closet, covered with a plastic bag. 

When Gary and I celebrated our first Christmas together, I saw that he had already been doing that same thing for years. His tree is the white one and mine is underneath the black bag in the corner.

my December wardrobe

Do my readers have special clothing they wear just for the holidays? I try to not buy much along these lines since these things are appropriate for such a short span of time. I've had all of these for anywhere from 3 to 8 years (when you only wear them one month out of twelve, as long as you don't stain them, they take a long time to wear out!). I carefully fold them after New Year's Day to store in a box -- no sense in having them on hangars taking up that space for 11 months.

Veterans Memorial Cemetery
Bushnell, Florida

Continuing on the subject of packing away Christmas, today we drove to the cemetery to retrieve the artificial wreaths we had placed at the graves of our late spouses a month ago. Not all of the grave areas had wreaths, for reasons unknown to us. 

We have taken live wreaths in the past, placing them earlier in the month than the cemetery volunteers do. We have been dismayed at how quickly they dry out and look ugly. We don't know if our graves are to be included in the big wreath-distribution effort, so we have taken our own, and this year (last month) we took artificial ones. 

That has proven to be a good plan. We secured them to the ground with landscaping pins so when we got them today, they were just as we had left them. The red bows were fading from red to orange, but we can easily replace those next year.

Of course, visiting the cemetery is a somber activity, but we like to do it about once a month or so, schedules and weather-permitting. For us it's cathartic. Maybe visiting the cemetery isn't for everyone, but it works for us. 

One of my widow friends, Sue, has said to me more than once that grief never goes away. You learn to live with it. That may smack of hopelessness but it's not. It just means that we love our departed ones so those feelings remain and we learn to accept them. But (at least for me) it does get a little easier. 

from FaceBook

This graphic may be appropriate. Perhaps our goal should be the big dog .... Grow to where the "stuff" doesn't hamper us so much. Our survival and sanity are at stake.

Long Horn Steak House

On a lighter note, as I box up the Christmas memories for 2024, both of us received a number of restaurant gift cards for Christmas (as well as the luxuries of chocolate, fruit, popcorn, nuts and cheeses). We used one of those cards on New Year's Eve for our celebratory lunch. 

Be sure to note the Christmas balls dangling from the cowboy's hand as he galloped through the dining room. If you examine closely the horse's back knees, you can see Gary's handsome head in our booth. He's got a head of pure white hair (which I love!). 

The last of the chocolate disappeared yesterday, which is good because their weight has begun to show up on my bathroom scale!

link to purchase

In early November I began a personal study in my daily quiet times with the Lord with the reading of this book. Adversity in my life in recent years led me to think about Old Testament Joseph and how he handled his troubles. This was an intriguing study that had me underlining and hi-lighting many sentences that spoke to my own issues, helping me to make sense of many things. I highly recommend it.

blooming Azaleas in January

January has got off to a rough start. With our culture as it is, we need to be watchful, to be aware of what is going on around us. But we also need to be looking up to our Lord, believing He has it all in His sight. Nothing escapes His notice. For those of us who know Him and  believe Jesus has redeemed us from our sins, we can confidently agree with the Apostle Paul:

In all things God works for the good

of those who love Him,

who have been called according to His purpose. 

Romans 8:28 NIV

Until next time, grace and peace.

Nostalgia

Facebook photo

Nostalgia

Welcome to fall, or as Pam reminded us at Closed Doors - Open Windows, this is the Autumnal Equinox. With the changing of the season (although it's not very apparent here in Florida yet), I've been in a wistful frame of mind.

my blog header 2013 - 2017

During my last 4 years of living in Colorado, my blog's title was "The Brown Bungalow" because we lived in a (brand new) Craftsman style house that looked (to me, anyway) like a cute bungalow. 

one of several headers I made for the 
Sweet Tea and Sandals blog

When we relocated to Florida, I changed the blog title to "Sweet Tea and Sandals," which communicated some of the fun changes taking place in my life with the move to a city on the Atlantic coast.

For many years I had a free creative program on my computer that enabled me to design my own headers. I loved being able to do that, but along with a lot of other unanticipated changes in recent years, I lost that feature. The program has since changed a lot and now requires a monetary subscription. I decided to do without it.

the header for the blog when I lost it

Then in late summer of 2023 I unintentionally did something dumb that resulted in the loss of Sweet Tea and Sandals. That terrible circumstance, combined with the changes referred to above, was like a gut punch, and more than I felt like tackling. I opted to start this blog, the one you are reading now, My Journal Memories.

my current blog header

This title does not stir up fanciful mental images of tropical food and footwear, but that's just as well because the themes of my writing have shifted to a more serious motif, acquired with aging and life events.

"Resiliency is the ability to take disappointment 

and conflict and turn it into something better."

Ginny Luther

Walk in My Combat Boots by James Patterson

Southern Living

But with that said, it's been over seven years since I arrived in Florida. I'm still wearing sandals eight or nine months out of the year and I love the way southern restaurants brew up sweet tea.

palm branches

Something I did not anticipate with living in Florida is the amount of landscaping upkeep required of homeowners, palm trees, in particular. To prevent branches from rubbing on roof shingles and leaving stuff in the gutters, Gary regularly uses his pole saw to cut things down.

trimming palm branches for 
the trash truck

Then there are the weeds. They never take a vacation. (smile) Gary was telling me the other day that one of his first favorable impressions of me was that I pull weeds. On one of our first dates, as we were leaving my front door, I stopped to pull up a couple of weeds in the mulch bed. As I stood up, I told him I don't have beautifully manicured hands because I pull weeds all the time. Fortunately for me, he saw the benefit of that quality in deciding if I was "a keeper." (note, I do get professional pedicures regularly to compliment my sandals.)

the pedicure of yours truly

Returning to the subject of autumn in Florida, we kind of have to pretend there is a change in seasons. My friend Sandy (blog: Home Ec Major) who lives in the Panhandle has taught me that although summer clothes are still required for comfort in the autumn and winter months, we can wear the more seasonal colors. For me, that means I switch from wearing white sandals to brown. 😉

Home Decor

We can also switch out some of the home decor, which I'm doing just a little more of this year. Jersey Girl and I had lunch this past week, followed with a little shopping at a resale store. 

"new" table runner

At just $9, this suede table runner was perfect for our dining room. Then on another day I found this pumpkin at Hobby Lobby:

on sale for $7-something

the lil' pumpkin looks good no matter 
where I put it!

Not into Halloween decorating AT ALL, I choose to focus on blessings, thankfulness, gratitude, pumpkins, and the foods of the season.

Food

Cracker Barrel

To segue from autumn decorations into seasonal foods, we bought a small loaf of pumpkin bread at Publix to go with our habit of de-caf coffee and tea in our mid-afternoons. 

Mid-week, we had lunch at Cracker Barrel where the decor lends itself especially well to autumn and winter. Of course, with 90-degree temps right now, there was no flame in the fire place. They do tend to light it up in December, partly for warmth but probably more for the ambience of the Christmas season.

my plate at Cracker Barrel

As I've said before, Gary and I eat a lot of "heat-and-eat," which translates to the fact I've not made a homemade meatloaf in some two years. But Cracker Barrel made up for it, along with the turnip greens, okra, and biscuits. I have, by the way, made biscuits for Gary several times, and they tasted good, but mine don't compare with the flaky tender version we had on that day. Gary had the fried chicken, which was such a large serving that he brought home leftovers that still made for an ample supper for the two of us. Fried chicken. It doesn't get much more "southern" than that!

Bushnell, Florida

Paying Respect

With the slightly cooler weather we're having, we made a trip to the cemetery to visit the gravesites of our late spouses. It's an hour-long drive to get there, so it is our habit to take folding lawn chairs with us and we sit for a while at each of the two graves. But with the searing heat and wilting humidity of summer, our last visit was in late May or early June. 

our car near Edith's headstone

In my growing up years, my family did not live anywhere near the cemeteries of our relatives, so this practice of visiting gravesites on a regular basis has been a learned experience for me since coming together with Gary. But I like it. 

the back of my late husband's headstone

What are we supposed to do when visiting a gravesite? That is a reasonable question.

During the first year, especially, I would just sit and cry. A lot. Then as time passed, I would talk to him, sort of telling him what had transpired, but not expecting (or wanting) any reply from him. Just getting things off my chest, as best I could. I would also thank him for leaving me in such a good place, so to speak. He really did.

Nowadays when Gary and I visit these graves, I reflect on how incredibly blessed I've been since Tom's passing. I thank God again (as I do every single day) for His mercies to protect and provide for me. 

I thank the Lord for forgiving me for my blunders, mistakes, and the (frankly) awkward manner in which I've handled some things during the depths of my sadness. I also thank Him for lessons I've learned about human nature (mine and others) that is imperfect and the need for forgiveness. As somebody said in a recent movie we saw on TV, "grief makes us do things we regret." 

But God forgives and Christ has redeemed the repentant. I hold tight onto that truth. 

a wetland area at the cemetery

Then to bring this line of thought to a close with a bit of a smile, as we were getting out of the car near my late husband's grave, we heard what sounded very much like the grunt of an alligator. Just across the road from our car was this wet area with cattails and pond scum. 

We did not see a gator, but the common warning here in Florida is that any body of water the size of a bathtub or larger has the potential of a gator. We did not poke around to verify that but turned with our lawn chairs in hand and headed for the burial ground. 

autumn color in Minnesota
2022

I close with this thought: Autumn is proof that change can be beautiful. Accepting change is key to surviving whatever adjustments beg to be made. 

Until next time, grace and peace.

Post Script: How to Flip a Photo Horizontally

After my previous blog post, Jennifer from Trading Ashes For Beauty asked how to flip a picture. Of course all I can tell you is how I do it on my MacBook Air laptop computer, using the Photo program that came with it. These instructions will probably vary depending on the equipment you have. If what you have is different, perhaps my instructions here will somehow get you started in figuring out how to do it on your own computer.

Step 1: here is a selfie of me holding up my iPhone. Note that the word "Broncos" is backwards. I want to flip the picture horizontally so "Broncos" is not backwards.

Step 2: however you normally do it, get the picture into your photo program. Then look for the word "edit." Mine is in the top right hand corner of my screen. Click on "edit."

Step 3: Near the top of my screen, in the center, is the word, "crop." Click on that.

Step 4: Now go back to the right side of the screen to find the word, "flip." Click on that.

Step 5: When you have done that, your snapshot will flip so that "Broncos" reads correctly.

Voila! I hope this is of some help!