A Delightful Throwback

Pam's church

Last Sunday we enjoyed what felt like a wonderful trip back in time. Pam, author of the blog Closed Doors Open Windows, had invited us to meet them at their church and follow that up with lunch. The drive from here to there is a little over an hour and on a Sunday morning the traffic was not bad at all, in spite of it being the end of the busy Thanksgiving weekend.

Over the years I have driven past their church many times as it is set off within easy view about half a block from the highway. My impression of their church was always favorable as the white siding and steeple looked like something out of an old Disney movie. But the church, the Lord's Church, is not a building but rather the people. Scripture refers to the Church as the bride of Christ, which is definitely something other than siding and steeples. 

When living in Jacksonville, we made many trips to Ocala to check the progress on the house we were having built. Pam and I became blog friends sometime before that construction began. Eventually we made stops to see her and John at their home. 

We arrived long enough before the service began that we were able to sit on the back pew and watch the people coming in, greeting each other, and finding their seats. True to what Pam had told us beforehand, the parishioners were very warm in their welcome to us. Some had known we were coming as Pam had shared that in the Sunday School class before the service. That made us to feel all the more accepted.

The music was a delight. Hymnals were in the back-of-the-pew racks, but the words were also on screens on the front wall. With one exception, I knew all the songs and enjoyed every one of them. There was no 'praise team' (as is so common in most protestant church services these days), but there was a choir (!!!) and their special music was composed and written, by two of the members. The pastor's wife led the music from the pulpit. 

There was just one instrument accompanying the worship time. No drums, no guitars, no super-loud anything. The one instrument was an electric piano/organ that can produce a lot of different sounds. 

During the announcement time, any first-time guests were introduced (which included us, of course). Wow. That is a tradition I haven't seen in church in a very, very long time. Of course, the huge mega churches can't do that for practical reasons. We didn't mind at all and just smiled and waved.

The service included the music, announcements, greeting the guests, responsive readings, prayer, lighting of the first candle for Advent, the sermon, and concluded with communion. As I told Pam and John at lunch afterwards, since I've gone to church all of my life I've seen communion carried out many different ways, some in a rather clumsy procedure. This time was easy, orderly, and respectful. 

Please don't take offense at how I've described this worship service that ministered to me so well. Times, customs, people, and even our culture, have changed greatly over the years. I just enjoyed so much getting to worship in an environment that reminded me of my beginnings, so to speak.

One more thing (and I didn't take a picture), the church building was built in 1890-something. The antique pews (which were blessedly padded) were built in that same time frame. Those pews along with the stained glass windows -- there was a lot of old-fashioned charm going on in there!

Pam and John

After the service we followed John and Pam to the Hog Wild Country Cafe where the down-home atmosphere was equally as pleasant as what we experienced at church. I ordered the pulled pork on a bun while Gary had the brisket. John got a hamburger, and Pam got the Cowboy Egg Rolls (on the appetizer menu). That looked really good to me; maybe next time!

Gary 'n me

Last weekend was winter here in Florida, so sweaters and jackets were a necessity, even inside the cafe. (S'cuse my shortie haircut -- it looked better in person than in the snapshots!!)

John and Gary

Before retirement, in addition to serving as a pastor in several churches, John was employed with law enforcement. That profession is in common with Gary's career, as well as their political views, so these guys never lack for conversation.

me 'n Pam

And of course, Pam and I always have things to talk about. As you can see, we both take pictures for our respective blogs!! Here is the link to her post about our visit: December 1st. 

antiques in the ladies' room

It's just wild getting to meet in person my fellow (sister) bloggers. To date, I've met at least 4 over the years (possibly more). When I came back to our lunch table after washing my hands, I told Pam about the antiques in the ladies' room and that I had taken a picture of them. She said she has done the same thing for  her blog in the past. (Great minds think alike!) Gary told me there were antiques in the men's room, too!

artificial wreaths

I want to tell you what we did this year to decorate the graves of our late spouses. As many of my readers already know, what turned out to be our first date in 2021 was a trip to the cemetery to place Christmas wreaths. Gary was taking me to the cemetery, which is about an hour's drive from Ocala. In some of our first conversations when we met, I said I had not been to the cemetery much because I did not want to go by myself and all my children live some distance away. As it turned out, Gary's late wife is buried relatively close to the grave of my late husband.

So this was not thought of at the outset especially as a "date," but by the end of the occasion, after much conversation, a wonderful lunch, and driving through some particularly beautiful roads to get back home, it felt like more than just a kindly gesture on his part.

One of the heart-warming things Gary did before picking me up that day was to buy two live Christmas wreaths for us to place at the graves. I, still rather new to how to visit a grave, had not given decorations a thought. 

We have kept up this tradition every year since then. But finding fresh-looking wreaths has been a problem. Last year we had a hard time even finding evergreen wreaths! We were shocked. What we found were already drying up with needles falling off.

This year Gary suggested we buy artificial wreaths and we will be sure to return to the cemetery after the holidays to retrieve them with hopes to use them again next year. We took metal landscaping pins with us to secure the wreaths to the ground in the hope that they won't blow away. While there, we saw someone else had used a metal stand to hold their wreath in place. That's a good idea, too.

music on TV

Now that the Christmas season is here, we drink our first cup of morning coffee to the sounds of continuous-play holiday music. Our TV  station shows many seasonal photos and artwork with the music. 

Ida and Bill's yard

And the angel said unto them,

Fear not: for, behold,

I bring you good tidings of great joy,

which shall be to all people.

For unto you is born this day

in the city of David a Saviour,

which is Christ the Lord.

Luke 2:10-11

Until next time, grace, peace, and JOY!

Beginning to Look Like Christmas

 

centerpiece on lanai table

Now that December is in full throttle, which seems so quick after a late Thanksgiving, I may be posting more often just to keep the posts from being too long. (does that even make sense?) I've taken a lot of snapshots lately, and life events are sprinkled in there, too, so keeping up is a challenge.

Christmas decorations. I've probably put out all that I'm going to (except that I'd like something for the front porch bistro table but haven't found it yet). Instead of a tour of our house decor, this year I'll include the pictures with whatever I happen to be writing about in my posts over the next few weeks. Keeping it casual and not so structured.

As for the centerpiece at the top of this post, I was looking for a plant pik for that artificial greenery that I have out all year. But after scouring Hobby Lobby the other day and not finding what I had in mind, it occurred to me that a festive bow would be nice. 

The green "petal" fabric thing under the pot is a small Christmas tree skirt that I made a few years ago. I saw one like it in a picture and decided a pattern was not necessary. I no longer need it for a tree skirt, but it comes in handy for other uses, as you can see.

sparkle added

Also while wandering the aisles of Hobby Lobby, I came across gold glittery stems to add to an existing arrangement by the back door of the lanai. When the sun shines on it, the sparkle looks great. Such an easy make-over (of sorts).

protecting bushes

The huge snowstorm that is disabling the north and northeast has not affected us badly but our temps have taken a nighttime dive. I'm loving it for the most part, and am glad it's temporary. In the meantime, we have some bushes needing a little extra love, so Gary pulled out the coverings and clothespins (to secure the coverings). I've also pulled out an extra blanket for our bed (for us) and that's felt good.

A word here about postage. I had a rude wake-up call a few days ago when sending off packages to the kids for Christmas. I usually send cash in a card, but this year I saw something I thought they would really enjoy and I forgot about postage. It would have been better to have the place from which I ordered these items to send the packages to the kids, but I was ordering them a couple of months ago and I wanted to see the items with my own eyes before wrapping and sending them off.

Deja vu menas, "the phenomenon of feeling as though one has lived through the present situation before." Yes, that's exactly what I experienced when I had to pay for postage on those packages. How could I have forgotten?!!! All things considered cash is so much easier to give.

Gary's dogs

I will hasten to add, however, that my kids are worth the extra expense (but next year their gifts may be "green" again).

It's all a part of the season, isn't it? The older we get the more we realize we should not sweat the small stuff, and it's all small stuff.  Or at least, it helps to say that to myself. 

Ending here on a light-hearted note, Shawna posted this on Facebook recently:

Mary, exhausted, having just gotten Jesus to sleep, is approached by a  young man who thinks to himself, "What this girl needs is a drum solo." 🙄

I think Jesus' birth had a lot more inconveniences, and even irritations, than the obvious ones. No one is exempt from the trials of earthly life. But we move forward, trusting that eventually it will all make sense and even prove to have been for good purposes. We just can't see that now with our earthly understanding.

Until next time, grace, peace, and joy.

Putting a Name to the Face

 

"What's his name?"

This past summer when we replaced all of the ceramic tile in our home for Luxury Vinyl Tile, one of the more tedious tasks was to empty the china cabinet of all the pretties so the furniture could be moved. This guy was on one of the glass shelves, toward the back, up kinda high, where I don't see him often. A playful thought immediately caused me to make a mental note to do something fun with him at Christmastime. 

But when I pulled him out of that cabinet last week, I decided I wanted to know who he is. Gary had no recollection of the fellow; we're thinking maybe Edith acquired him while visiting a museum during their years of living in the Washington D.C. area. So I put out this query on my Facebook page:

Here are the responses I've had so far:

Leah: Worth $450. 

ENNIO FURIESI Late 20th Century Italian Bust of David After Michelangelo, Vtg.

Grace: That is my guess too.

Linda: pretty sure it’s Michelangelo. My knowledge comes from all the useless art history classes, LOLO. Hope that made you smile.

George: Here is one used for $25. Per google a vintage bust of David. (he included a picture with this)

Julian: David 

Suzan: I see you already have the answer.

MaryAnn: … wine bottle and head of David. I have one too. It’s at least 55 years old.

Some distinguishing features about this piece: 

appears to a be a healthy, slim young man

curly hair

sort of a ponytail at the nape of the neck

a wash cloth draped over his left shoulder

maybe the sculptor caught him exiting the shower

With all that said (and thanks to all who commented) the conclusion I'm reaching is that this is Michelangelo's version of Old Testament King David.

As is true of many of you, I am profoundly grateful for David's songs and prayers recorded in Scripture, because his words help me to articulate the deep things in my heart, especially when I'm upset. 

I do wonder, and hope, that this will be taken in the attitude of fun because Christmas is a season of celebration, joy, gifts, stories, games, good food, and laughter. How this small Santa's hat came into my collection of things, I have long since forgotten. But when I saw the person in the china cabinet, this is what came to mind:

So there you have it. Along with the serious we have fun. He is a participant in our holiday decor this month. In another post I'll tour you through our home to see what else we've pulled out to celebrate.

Until next time, grace, peace, and joy.

Wrapping Up Thanksgiving

It's the day after Thanksgiving and I'm still reflecting on blessings, especially those that can be taken for granted. 

years of letters

Since our mother's passing in late October, Sister has been very busy with the necessary end-of-life matters. She has sent some of Mama's books and the letters I wrote to her these last several years when phone conversations were nearly impossible and in-person visits were hard due to the distance. Not only did Mama pass on to me a love for sewing, but she and I value the ability to type out our communications (as opposed to hand-writing). 

Especially after Mama moved to the nursing home in 2019, I wrote a snail mail letter to her every Friday. Her ability to understand was decreasing over time, so I kept the letters light-hearted and contained to just one page. Often a snapshot or other art work were included to add more interest. 

When she could, Mama read the letters herself and then over time Sister would read them to her. In the last couple of months, some of the letters never got opened. She became unresponsive at times and mail would get shuffled off to the side for more important things that had to be done for her. I understand and take no offense at that.

Now that I have the letters back with me, this week I have opened all of them, arranged them in chronological order, and packed them away for another time when they might be put into a 3-ring binder. They make up a diary of sorts of my own life over the past five years.

Although Mama's ability to communicate with me decreased greatly in those years, I will never forget that after my late husband died, Mama asked her nurse to telephone me.  I answered, seeing that the nursing home was on the caller ID. The nurse told me that my mother was with her and had a message for me:

"Barbara, I am so sorry Tom has died." 

I cannot tell you how deeply that touched me, coming from my mother who was getting forgetful of people and things but she had enough presence of mind to ask her nurse to call me with that message. Mama was widowed a very long time ago, and she clearly still remembered what that was like. Grief lessens over time but it's not entirely forgotten.

Earlier this week was the 4-year anniversary of Tom's passing, his funeral, and his burial. It was the week of Thanksgiving when that all happened. Oh how I thank God for His mercies and how He sustained me at that time and ever since! It's not been smooth sailing by any means but there've been more joys than I ever imagined could come my way.

Gary and me

So back to working through this week, we took the truck through the car wash, which my weird sense of humor refers to as "the tunnel of love."

windshield with colorful soap

In running the windshield wipers after the wash, we realized something was amiss that made a loud noise. Gary checked it out enough to know it was not something he could fix, so we were able to get an o'dark-early appointment at the Ford dealership service center for the next day. The repair was short but long enough for us to enjoy coffee and a donut in the waiting room. I saw this thought-provoking statement on one of the walls:

Being kind costs nothing

but pays huge dividends.

I wish in reality that this was true all of the time but with that said, it's a good thought to live by.

Speaking of kindness, we enjoyed the hospitality of family for Thanksgiving dinner. My niece and her husband moved from Georgia back to Florida a couple of years ago. They invited us for the holiday, as well as one other senior on my nephew's side of the family, and a younger cousin. Gary joked on the ride over that Thanksgiving is "National Invite the Old Folks to Dinner Day." 🦃

Whatever you want to call it, we were delighted with the invitation and offered to bring dessert. Our friend, Bob Evans, did the cooking for me with a pecan and a pumpkin pie, supplemented with Cool Whip, of course.

Our hosts are devoted animal lovers. The above sign is at the outside of their front door. They currently have three dogs and a bird but since canines can sometimes be overly enthusiastic with guests, and we are all older, our hosts sequestered the dogs out of sight. We didn't meet them. However, we did get to meet Desi:

Desi the Macaw

A Macaw is a type of Parrot. He has been a member of their family for many years. I looked closely at him through the wires of his large cage in the kitchen/gathering area of the house, and he eyed me, but he kept his judgment to himself. He did squawk loudly several times while we were there, and he may have said something to my nephew, but I didn't catch what it was. We were told that he does indeed speak clearly when he wants to.

our hosts

As best I could tell, he did not seem to feel threatened as my nephew carved up the main dish on a nearby kitchen counter... 🙄

We also had ham, mashed potatoes with gravy, stuffing, green bean casserole, a corn casserole (that I could easily enjoy every day for the rest of my life), Watergate salad, cranberry sauce and [surely I've left something out]. 

Before dinner we had fresh veggies and baked Brie with crackers. Wow. I've not had baked Brie before. I could get addicted to that!! True to their promise, none of us left their home hungry. We were given leftovers, which we enjoyed for our lunch today.

our front door

Today Gary turned the kitchen calendar on the pantry door to the December page. I got out the boxes of Christmas decorations, and we put up our trees (2). I'll be honest here in confessing that although I was on my soap box a week or so ago about not putting up Christmas decorations until Thanksgiving is over, I did allow Gary to hang our new wreath on the front door before the day of Thanks dawned. 

We got it at Lowe's, along with the brass over-the-door hangar. I reasoned that since it has no red or green, it looked appropriate for the season. It also matches very nicely with the copper foil that is soldered to the pieces of glass in the door's design. 

The rest of our Christmas/holiday decorations can take up another blog post. 

In the meantime, I close with one more Thanksgiving-related  thought from Christian writer Randy Alcorn's blog earlier this week:

G. K. Chesterton, one of the happiest and cleverest minds of the twentieth century, noted that children are grateful when their Christmas stockings are filled with candy or toys. But what about “the gift of two miraculous legs” inside our stockings? “We thank people for birthday presents of cigars and slippers. Can I thank no one for the birthday present of birth?”

Until next time, grace and peace.

Thanksgiving 2024

To all of my readers, thank you for coming by!

Go get yourself another slice of pie! 😋
 

Retirement Home Agenda

from Reader's Digest

When we drink our morning coffee in our jammies, we talk about the day's plans. I usually suggest a thing or two while Gary is either too sleepy to say much or just wants to keep his thoughts to himself until he's seen the weather forecast. Often by day's end he's muttering with his mock grouchy face things like: "You worked me too hard!" 🙄 

Yeah, right. We're retired. How hard do we really work?! (Maybe more than you would think.)

goodbye, Bench

Yesterday we had a plan to do one thing and then that led to this and this led to that, and (you get the idea). One of those things was to list my black metal bench on our neighborhood marketplace -- for free. It was a nice bench, but we never sit on it (it was more attractive than comfortable) and was just another thing to secure outside when there is a serious storm threat.

Yes, I could have put a $$ tag on it but I just didn't want to deal with the calls that come with the games people play in an effort to get something for nothing. So I stated in the ad that I'd bought the bench in 2018, and it was in excellent condition except that it needed a fresh coat of paint. It was FREE. As you can imagine, it was claimed in less than 30 minutes and was loaded into the new owner's SUV right after supper. G'bye!

Also yesterday we disassembled the gas grill and loaded it into the back of our truck to haul it off to the dump. It has not been used in a long time. We have a camp stove that takes up much less space should our power go out. We gave the nearly full propane tank to a neighbor.

one of our local nurseries

I suggested we go to a nearby nursery on our way home from the dump. We recently had a palm tree removed and have been wondering what to place on the flat stump that remains. It looks a lot like a table, just waiting for -- something.

A couple of bushes were purchased, along with a clump of Blue Daze flowers. We also took advantage of a sale to bring home this addition to our Asian-themed back yard:

Gary spent three years in Japan in his first Air Force assignment, so he's got an appreciation for the architecture. I like it, too.

Our pagodas are beautiful works of art. Occasionally a Gecko can be seen peering out through the windows, like tourists at a light house or the Statue of Liberty. 

For that palm tree stump, we ended up taking apart an oriental-style fountain we already had that had not been connected to water. Gary secured the bowl to the stump. 

As you can see by the diameter of the trunk, it was a very large palm. It had grown some 40 feet tall. In addition to the increased costs of maintenance (hiring a crane to trim the dying branches up so high), there was the worry of it crashing down on our roof some day in a turbulent storm.

evidence of yard work

Besides adding embellishments, a couple of large gangly bushes were dug up, replaced with something more suitable and other shrubs were trimmed. When Gary and I combined our households, one of the most useful things I brought to our union were 3 large bins from my years in Colorado. It always warms my heart that I could contribute something so practical and useful to Gary's enjoyment of trimming bushes and trees.

Earlier this week we added a couple more chairs to the patio setting and had some neighbors over for chocolate cream pie (courtesy of Publix). That was before the cold wind and a dive into cold temperatures arrived. I am pretty sure summer here in North Central Florida is finally over. 

Chocolate Creme Pie

Forgive the repetition from my last post, but here is another reference to my happiness that Gary can once again ride bikes with me. He's the one who got me started with cycling nearly 3 years ago but for the past 9 months he's been watching me pedal by our house from the comfort of a porch chair. 

Our neighbor was getting ready for his own morning athletics when he saw us and assumed we were getting ready to ride. Our response was that no, we had already been out and were just now returning home. He seemed impressed that the two old folks had got up and out so early!

When we ride our bikes into other neighborhoods within our [large] +55 retirement community, we pass by these metal dancers. (at least, I like to think of them as dancers) Such a cheery sight.

Another house we pass on our bicycles is this one with a flower box over the garage. I doubt the florals are real but aren't they pretty? I've never been to Europe, but I think of this as a charming Old World influence. 

entrance road to our guard gate

I suppose the above snapshot should be labeled "progress." We are in shock to see how our builder has literally bull-dozed a huge area to make room for more houses. All of that open area in the picture above used to be a DENSE forest of pine trees alongside about a half mile at the entrance to our community. Apparently it's been in the master plan all along that our development would build there, but after driving past the forest for years, the violent sudden removal of so many huge shade trees has been a serious jolt. You would think they could have just harvested the trees instead of burning them.

On the subject of change (baffling ones in particular), 2024 has been full of that for many of us. I won't list the ones that have affected me; I know many of you have had puzzling things going on in your experiences, too. In recent years I have had what I consider to be an unusual number of times when something unexpected confronted me and I truly did not know what to do. It's been like an Advanced Placement course in The School of Hard Knocks. In looking back, I see that in spite of the discomfort, all of my needs have been met. To be honest, I am a little wiser for the experiences, more cautious. In some situations I am less trusting, while more trusting in others. 

At this season of Thanksgiving, it's normal to review the year and draw some conclusions. It's my prayer that I'm hearing what God is saying to me, obeying His direction, and not messing up anybody else along the way with my responses. 

One of my Facebook friends recently posted this piece called, "The I don't know prayer." Perhaps you have seen it. I close with it and hope it comforts you the way it helps me.

Yes, Amen! Until next time, grace and peace.

The Season of Thanks

 

Pumpkin Spice Roll

Up front I will tell you that the above picture will not be accompanied with a recipe. I like the first photo in my blog posts to be something beautiful or eye-catching (in a good way), or delicious because that's what gets posted on Facebook when I announce my most recent post. First impressions.... you get it. The picture needs to be something that may encourage the reader to continue.

Although I'm not posting a recipe, I chose the plate with Pumpkin Spice Roll to illustrate that this is the season to celebrate gratitude, thanksgiving, and acknowledgement of the countless blessings every single one of us have.

Christmas decor at a local store

When Gary and I left on the morning of Halloween to drive to the Midwest for my mother's funeral, there were skeletons, spider webs, and spooky jack-o-lanterns everywhere (keeping in mind that, as I've said before, I'm not a fan of Halloween). 

When we got back home just five days later, Christmas had popped out and Thanksgiving is almost nowhere to be found. This was starkly evident when Jersey Girl and I had lunch and then perused through a popular shop where not only was Christmas everywhere, but much of it in non-traditional colors and themes. 

I find this to be disheartening, and I suspect many of you feel the same. ("birds of a feather flock together....") I am reminded of the song by the late Andrae Crouch with these words:

How can I say thanks

For the things You have done for me?

Things so undeserved

Yet You gave to prove Your love for me

The voices of a million angels

Could not express my gratitude

All that I am and ever hope to be

I owe it all to Thee.

My Tribute (To God Be The Glory)

How quickly we forget the simplest of blessings, such as being able to climb out of bed on our own strength every morning to navigate safely to the toilet. We forget the blessings of hot water (running water, even), and the ability to put spoon to mouth as we enjoy our breakfast cereal. 

Yes, yes, I know. Much of the early Christmas emphasis is based on making money. I'll leave it at that. I know I'm preaching to the choir here. But with that said, aside from having completed much of my Christmas shopping a month or so ago (!!!), the Christmas decor is not coming out of storage in our house until after our observation of Thanksgiving Day.

flags at our Reunion Center

This past week began with Veterans Day on November 11. We rode our bikes over to the Reunion Center in our gated retirement community with the expectation to observe the ceremonial flag raising we've enjoyed in the past. Nobody was there. Not a soul except us. We had not seen an announcement about it but just assumed tradition would continue. Disappointing. 

I've been married to two Vets, have a son who is a Vet, and a nephew, just to recognize a few. The willingness of these people to serve in the military on behalf of the rest of us is stunning when one really thinks about it. 

lunch on Veterans Day

That day is special to Gary and me in another way, too, as we celebrate the anniversary of the day we met! A mutual friend basically lured the two of us to that community flag ceremony so we could meet and the rest is happy history! 

For Gary's birthday in October, I gave him a gift card for one of his favorite restaurants. We used that for our lunch. Can you guess where it was? (hint: the black metal cowboy decor is in all of their locations)

cheesecake dessert

Because Gary is a Vet, our waitress said we could have a free appetizer or dessert. We opted for the dessert, taking it home to enjoy later. The above is my half.

selfie at a car show in 2022
taken with the hood of a Corvette

Last weekend we also visited a local car show honoring Veterans. We came across a truck much like one Gary's family had when he was a very little tyke. He was 2 years old. While this one was a bright yellow, Gary's Dad's truck was green. 

Gary beside a 1947 Ford truck

There is a story to be told about this truck. The family was originally from Missouri but was moving to Idaho upon the recommendation of an uncle. Gary's Dad had built a wood camper top and attached it to the bed of the truck. Gary and his two older brothers (ages about 2, 4, and 6) rode in the back while their parents enjoyed the comfort of the cab. 

Gary (the smallest boy) with his dad and two brothers 
and the 1947 Ford truck in Missouri

While driving across Wyoming, a big wind caught that camper top and absolutely blew it off! For the rest of the ride to Idaho, the boys crowded into the cab with the folks. That appears to be one of Gary's earliest childhood memories -- and who could forget something like that?!!

from our home decor

A few paragraphs ago I mentioned that we had ridden our bikes to the flag poles. Yes, Gary has resumed his enjoyment of bike-riding. He's had two surgeries this year, the first one in March. His bicycle has been gathering dust since then as time was given for healing (and a second surgery to tweak what was done in the first procedure). Each day this week he has ridden just a little farther and his body appears to be handling it well. (thanks to all who have been praying about Gary's health)

"bird legs" on her bike

This is the season for craft shows. At the annual Leisure Arts Club craft show in our ball room, I bought a light-weight bag with a long cross-body strap to hold my cell phone while we bike the neighborhood. Several pairs of my spandex bike pants have deep pockets to hold the phone but I prefer this bag (expertly sewn by my former neighbor, MaryAnn!).

Irish Chain for my kitchen nook
Castle Rock, Colorado 2013

Speaking of exercise, those of you who are on Facebook know how they put up pictures from past posts, asking if we want to share them again. I usually don't, but this one popped up recently. It's a wall quilt I designed and sewed specifically for our breakfast area, incorporating the colors of our "country" style of decor at the time. This has been one of my very favorites of all the quilts I made over the years. 

But in reference to exercise: back in my sewing days, I could easily spend the hours from after breakfast until time to start supper all in my sewing room. Often hunched over the sewing machine, an embroidery hoop, bent over the cutting table and so forth, with a sense of satisfaction from my creations also came tight neck and shoulders, sometimes with a raging headache, too.

A LOT of changes have rearranged my preferences over the past four years, including a near abandonment of sewing and a lot more outdoor physical exercise. Walking and biking -- most days of the week. My health has greatly improved as a result. 

TV screen shot from 
The Golden Bachelorette

Also in reference to how my life has changed these past four years, this fall when the TV advertised The Golden Bachelorette, I told Gary I wanted to watch it. I'm not a fan of any of the Bachelor or Bachelorette shows, and to even bring that up makes Gary roll his eyes! 

But I was interested to see how this senior woman (age 61, if you want to call that 'senior') would handle dating as a widow. We watched the first episode and that was more than enough for me because it was just so, so -- fairytale and unrealistic. 

But when the last episode came on, I wanted to see how it turned out.  Filmed in Bora Bora with perfect weather, stunning evening gowns (and she had the absolutely perfect tan with perfect long blond hair), it was, again, just too too [whatever]. Her wisdom about introducing her new love to her existing family was noteworthy. But with that said, I have no intention of continuing to watch the show because even "reality TV" is not completely real. 

ice cream at Culver's
with support group friends

Reality TV is my segue into a paragraph about support groups. "Small groups" or "support groups" are terms often used these days to help people cope with the hardships life throws at us. My first support group was GriefShare, which I began attending only ten days after Tom's death. I was surprised how helpful it was, so much so that I went through its 13-week program twice.

Then without divulging details about Gary's health, we found it helpful to attend support groups regarding his circumstances. For a time we were in two groups but one just wasn't a good fit for us, while the other has been very beneficial. 

In a support group, a good one, people are free to speak aloud those questions, worries, and experiences that have created a need for information, help, understanding, and so forth. As they say regarding Las Vegas, the same is to be true with a support group: what [is talked about] in support group stays in support group. 

sorting the stationery 

As I close out this post, I share something I find to be ironic. One of the things I brought home from Mama's funeral is her collection of stationery. A trained secretary (and I am, too), she had half a dozen spiral-bound steno pads, thank you notes, blank cards, cute note pads, some unused Christmas cards, and an assortment of envelopes of varying sizes. 

I, "my mother's daughter," as they would say, already had my own accumulation of these same things. In this day and age, hand-written notes are becoming rare. And then last night we heard on the news that the United States Post Office will be raising postage prices AGAIN on January 19th! 

Well, it's a pleasant problem, sorting through it all, deciding what to keep, what to donate. I am not complaining, just making an observation.

In closing as I go through some of my mother's things and approach the anniversary of my first husband's passing, I am reminded of this verse:

Teach us to number our days,

that we may gain a heart of wisdom.

Psalm 90:12

May we use our days wisely -- not forgetting to be thankful and showing our gratitude to both God and people.

Until next time, grace and peace.